Thursday, 1 February 2018

A Year Ago Today

Dear Baby Bo,

Very soon I will be meeting you face to face. In a week's time your Daddy and I, sleep deprived and so in love, will be holding you in our arms and marvelling over every yarn, sneeze and burp. But a year ago things were very different.

A year ago today you weren't.

This is perfectly normal for most babies. Most babies don't exist a full year before they're born. But you're not like most babies and a year ago today the ball had well and truly started rolling on bringing you into the world, even though it would still be another fortnight before you as you really existed.

Traditionally you need two ingredients to make a baby, but you were cooked using an extra special recipe.

A year ago today we went to pick up some of the ingredients we needed to make you, and the following day I started with my first injection.

A year ago today the scan showed I had 16 antral follicles which the medication would grow (along with some friends they recruited along the way until I had over 40) and one of those would produce the egg that helped make you (and any little brothers or sisters you might end up with in the future).

A year ago today the parts that helped make you were just on the cusp of springing into being and now, a year on, you're just on the cusp of emerging into the world.

I can feel you squirming in my belly (kicking at your Daddy's hand the second he places it on my belly but being rather more nonchalant about your response to my hand) and I wonder if you have any idea of what's to come. This coming weekend is likely to be long and hard for both of us, but we've survived everything else so far, and we'll get through this as well. I can't wait until we can look into each other's eyes for the first time, instead of peeking in on you via television screens and I wonder what you'll make of me when I'm more than just a heartbeat, food supply and a sensation of the outside world.

I'm going to miss feeling you inside of me, but I can't wait to have you in my arms at last, I've waited a long time for this, Baby Boy.

See you soon,
All my love,

Your Mummy