Monday, 13 April 2015

#AtoZChallenge: K is for Knocked Up

This is the eleventh of a series of posts that I’m posting during the A to Z Challenge; that’s a blogging challenge where you aim to post a blog post for each letter of the alphabet throughout the month of April (with Sundays off for good behaviour). During my first A to Z Challenge I wrote about infertility, which I’m sort of revisiting during A to Z Challenge 2015.

My theme this year is IVF/ICSI, a process we’re starting at the moment and today it’s K is for Knocked Up.


If you’re going through the entire IVF process, you’ll be doing it for one reason; the desire to be knocked up. Or to put it rather more nicely, because you would like to get pregnant and ultimately have children. The phrase ‘knocked up’ fits the letter K far more neatly for the purposes of the A to Z Challenge. This isn't an announcement of any kind. Not yet anyway!

Getting pregnant is your ultimate goal, but it’s actually quite a far off one when you begin having IVF. The whole fertility treatment process is a whole series of hurdles; first you’re building up to getting started with all the tests and waiting for your period (one of the only times you’ll ever be looking forward to getting it); then you’re hoping to get to egg retrieval and actually get some usable ones; then you’re waiting for those eggs to fertilise and grow before they’re put back in; then for embryo transfer; and finally for the (hopefully) positive pregnancy test.

It’s easy to forget that at the end of the day, you’re doing all this for the little person who will hopefully join your family. There are so many things you have to get through before you get to that point that sometimes it’s just easier to focus on the here and now; the here and now being injections and blood tests and scans with everything else just a distant speck of light that you’re hopefully going to get to see in greater detail in the future.

There’s also an aspect of not wanting to get your hopes up too much. Obviously you want this all to end in a nice round baby bump and a screaming bundle, but if you’re anything like me you’ll probably try not to think about that fictional future too much. It’s almost like you’ll jinx your treatment.

This time around I’m slightly more jaded, since the original cycle had to be cancelled before retrieval, I’m trying to keep myself grounded while at the same time be cautiously optimistic. It’s a confusing state of mind to be in and it’s one that’ll only get more confusing once I start taking the syringefuls of hormones.


And that’s why, if you’re friends with someone who is going through the IVF process, try and focus on the things that are going on right now, rather than the hypothetical baby your friend will hopefully be cuddling next year. Hopefully there will be plenty of time to discuss baby clothes, nursery options and when they’ll return to work once the baby is born in the future. For now, just hold on and wait for the next mood swing. ;-)

15 comments:

  1. It's never easy or even funny, having to wait for the next period, hoping it doesn't show up. Worse if you are going through the IVF process. Something Giuliana Rancic said, "we try throughout our lives trying not to get pregnant, then suddenly it's what we want most."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've heard that quote before and it's very apt!

      Thanks for visiting. :-)

      Delete
  2. It's never easy waiting every month for your period to show up, and seriously hoping that it doesn't. Worse if you are going through the IVF process.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I hope you get the 'knocked up' results that you want at the end of all the testing and doctor visits.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am long past the age of having children. My grandchildren are starting to arrive and they had quite a trial with getting "knocked up". I totally understand the frustration.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you and hope your grandchildren all arrive without too many delays or hiccoughs. ;-)

      Delete
  5. I had just seen, a quick news item that some 65(I think 65) German lady, who already has 13 kids is having 4 or 5 more-like a litter. Now this was on TV on one of those news spots where it was written and it was hard for me to see the age. If she is 65 she will be 75 when this youngest litter is 10. To me that is not fair to the young children. I also think of people, like yourself, who just are happy to have 1 child. My mom had my brother who was an Ooops(they were not married yet and this was 1961). They tried for 2 years and my mom had no idea what to do. The Doctor told her to "stop trying". He claimed her hormones and her body, if she was anxious, were killing her chances of conceiving. She stopped thinking about it and boom I was born 3 years after my brother. Now my mom had no physical ailments but I do believe, in anything, worry and anxiety does not help. I hope you find a way to be able to remain calm which sounds ridiculous when I write it. What do I know but I just wish you all the best!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. :-)

      In the UK there are age limits on having fertility treatments as well as on the number of embryos put back to prevent cases like the one you saw on the news.

      One of the hardest things to do when you're going through treatment is to try and relax, but I agree that winding yourself up doesn't help things along. I do have a handy relaxation CD to get me through those later stages of treatment. :-)

      Delete
  6. I've never understood the phrase "knocked up". It's one of those strange ones that I wonder where it came from.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have no idea. It's weird, but much better than 'preggers' or 'up the duff'. ;-)

      Delete
  7. Wow. You've picked a challenging topic. We haven't yet really put forth an effort into trying to have children, but based on past experience, it seems that the IVF or similar routes may be something we'll need to consider. I can only imagine the emotional toll it can take. Thank you so much for visiting me so that I could find you via A to Z! Elle @ Erratic Project Junkie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hehe, I never like to go for the easy route with things. ;-)

      Unfortunately fertility issues are one of those things that most people don't realise there are problems with until they actively start trying and it can feel really lonely at times. Hopefully you won't find yourself in that situation, but if you do, there is a lot of support out there. :-)

      Thanks for stopping by.

      Delete
  8. Yep. Hoping for the baby clothes and 2 a.m. feedings for you...
    Cat

    ReplyDelete

Let me know what you think. :-)