Saturday, 29 August 2015

Film Review: The Two Towers, Part 6

As you're currently reading this, I'm in Wales preparing to go out to lunch in Cardiff. Quite a change from my usual Saturday lunch (which is frequently spent with my laptop balanced on my lap while I write blog posts for the coming week).

This is the last in the series of film review posts for The Two Towers. We will be very shortly moving on to The Return of the King. Hopefully next week, depending on how busy I am once I return to Scotland.

When we ended things last week it was not looking at all good for the guys at Helm's Deep, so this week we're going to see how that ends. Merry was also decidedly disappointed with Treebeard's decision not to do anything about Saruman and Isengard, so we'll see what happens next there as well. Oh, and Faramir's still got Frodo, Sam and Gollum at Osgiliath, but that'll change this week as well.

273. Treebeard's going to drop Merry and Pippin on the outskirts of the forest so they can make their way home. But that gives Pippin an idea; he figures Saruman won't be looking for them near Isengard, so that's a far more logical place to drop them. That's a little confusing for Treebeard, but he figures Hobbit brains must work quicker than his and can't argue with this plan.

274. Pippin's up to something, but he's not telling Merry what he's thinking.

275. And now we're seeing Faramir and the other two Hobbits. Things aren't looking good for Osgiliath.

276. Pippin's request to go South results in Treebeard stumbling into what can only be described as a massacre, when you're an Ent and most of your friends are trees. This makes Treebeard very angry.

277. So two days of debating with other Ents results in a no vote. A thirty second glimpse of a destroyed forest and Treebeard decides to attack. Who said Ents aren't hasty?

278. I do love the march of the Ents. Tolkien was right, that's so much more impressive than a bunch of guys disguised as trees.

279. Back to Osgiliath. They've basically taken their prisoners into an active war zone. Surely it'd be easier to have just killed the Hobbits and their companion, then take the Ring, rather than leading them here.

280. I'm guessing Faramir doesn't want to do the dirty work, he's passing them onto his father to let him do what he wants with him. I get it, it's because Faramir is a better person than his father.

281. Sam tells Faramir some home truths about Boromir and then Frodo gets his Carol Anne on and tells everyone 'They're here' whilst his eyes roll back in his head.

282. Oh look, it's the Nazgûl. This is getting better and better. Looks like Gondor wouldn't have come to Rohan's aid even if they'd asked for it.

283. Back at Helm's Deep Théoden has pretty much given up. Aragorn's having to force him into action, trying to come up with a way for the women and children to get out.

284. Eventually a suicide mission is about all that prompts him into action. Aragorn convinces Théoden to go out in glory.

285. And then we hear Gandalf's voice. When did he say he would be back?

286. Since Gimli's not much use on a horse, he gets the job of blowing the big horn to announce they're coming out.

287. It's like Uruk Hai bowling as they ride down the causeway.

288. It really is a suicide mission. There's about eight of them against about a bazillion Uruk Hai.

289. Luckily Gandalf's shown up. And he's brought Éomer with him, along with a freaking huge army. Yay!

290. Although you wouldn't catch me riding down that slope. I'm not sure you'd actually be able to stop at the bottom! It seems better suited to Legolas's shield surfing trick.

291. I wish the Ents attacking Isengard was longer because I love watching them do battle. They way they just toss bits of masonry around is brilliant. Even Merry and Pippin get in on the action.

292. I do feel sorry for the Ent who gets set on fire though.

293. Saruman really did not anticipate this happening, did he? Should've been nicer to the trees, mate.

294. How brilliant is it that when Isengard floods all the Ents stand still and brace themselves, except the one who was set alight? He runs into it to put himself out. I love it.

295. Trees and water win. Nature's going to do it every time.

296. Meanwhile, in Osgiliath, Frodo is giving in to the forces of evil. The Nazgûl is hovering overhead and Frodo's just merrily waving the Ring around. That is until Sam knocks him over and nearly gets stabbed in the process.

297. Frodo does seem a little shocked by his behaviour so he's not gone entirely over to the dark side yet.

298. Hehe, 'It's all wrong, by rights we shouldn't be here." No Sam, you shouldn't.

299. I love the 'great stories' quote. It's one of those ones that I always look forward to in the book.

300. Meanwhile we get a glimpse of Helm's Deep where the battle is turning for the better (and the shot of Aragorn has been flipped), and Isengard is being drenched, much to Saruman's dismay.

301. Love, love, love this quote.

302. "What are we holding onto Sam?" "That there's some good in this world, Mr Frodo, and it's worth fighting for." This gives me so many feels.

303. It's given Faramir feels too. He's been listening in to this conversation and he's decided, regardless of what his dad might to do him, he's going to let the little guys go so they can finish their mission.

304. And Helm's Deep has suddenly been surrounded by a forest that wasn't there before. The Uruks run into it, there's some shuddering and screaming and then it all goes quiet.

305. That was almost an Aragorn/Éowyn kiss right there. Be still my shippy heart.

306. Final results for the competition between Gimli and Legolas: it's a tie, but only because Legolas decided to finish off the Uruk that Gimli had already killed.

307. Merry and Pippin are elbow deep in water, observing that Saruman doesn't look too happy.

308. I love that when Pippin spots an apple in the water, he looks up. After all, that is where the last one came from.

309. And they've got pipe weed. All is right with the world again. I love Merry's reasoning as to why they shouldn't share it with Treebeard.

310. Hehe, and Treebeard investigating when the smoke comes out the doorway.

311. Faramir's sending the Hobbits out through the sewer. Sam comments on how noble their former captor is. If he was that noble, I think he'd find somewhere a little more pleasant than a sewer for their escape.

312. Sounds like Frodo's path into Mordor is going to be a dangerous one. That'll make the next film interesting then.

313. Before he lets the trio go on, Faramir gives Gollum some words of warning. If I were Faramir I think I'd go along with them, rather than go back and face my father.

314. Aww, Sam's even trying to Gollum now. Too bad that it's too late for that now.

315. "The battle for Helm's Deep is over. The battle for Middle-earth is about to begin." Way to kill the moment, Gandalf. Give them a moment longer to enjoy their victory.

316. Oh and this bit about the story of Frodo and Samwise the Brave is another of my favourite quotes from the book. I like this piece of music as well. It's all optimistic and hopeful.

317. Too bad Sméagol's decided to listen to the Gollum side since Frodo betrayed him. Frodo handed him over to Faramir, so Gollum's going to hand Frodo and Sam over to Her. Just who 'she' is, unless you've read the book, you'll have to wait until the next film. That was a bit of bummer when the next film was a whole year away.

318. I like how this film ends with a shot of Mordor, just like the last one, except this time it's a hell of a lot closer.

319. Oh and then we get a creepy song for the end credits. It's good, but it's my least favourite of the three end credit songs for this trilogy.

And thus ends The Two Towers.

Now I am aiming to have first part of the review of The Return of the King up next week, but it depends on how time and internet access works out when I get back from Wales. If it's not up next week, it'll definitely be the following week. I promise.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off for some lunch.


  1. I watched a coupe of the movies when I saw them on cable. I just couldn't get into them. I really thought I would like them too.

    1. I think Mr Click always humoured me with my Lord of the Rings obsession. He's watched the films but I know he definitely doesn't enjoy them as much as me. Though now the Hobbit films are out he really enjoys those and I think he enjoys the Lord of the Rings ones a bit more because of the Hobbit ones.


Let me know what you think. :-)