#AtoZChallenge: D is for Dildo Cam

This is the fourth of a series of posts that I’m posting during the A to Z Challenge; that’s a blogging challenge where you aim to post a blog post for each letter of the alphabet throughout the month of April (with Sundays off for good behaviour). During my first A to Z Challenge I wrote about infertility, which I’m sort of revisiting during A to Z Challenge 2015.

My theme this year is IVF/ICSI, a process we’re starting at the moment and today it’s D for Dildo Cam.

I did say at the beginning of this challenge that this would be a somewhat tongue-in-cheek look at the IVF/ICSI treatment process. This is one of those posts.

If you’re not lucky enough to have become acquainted with a dildo cam, this is a dildo cam:

About as well endowed as your average man.

It’s worth noting here that I had several options for where this post ended up. It could have been filed under T for Trans-Vaginal Ultrasound, U for Ultrasound and V for Vaginal Ultrasound. Hell, I could even have used it for I for Internal Examination. It probably says something about me considering I settled on D for Dildo Cam right from the very beginning.

The name obviously stems from its likeness to a certain adult implement. The likeness is only enhanced by the giant condom that is placed over it before it is inserted into the obvious place.

It’s not exactly comfortable and it becomes less comfortable as the drugs take effect on your body and make that whole area tender, particularly when someone is waving around a long wand and poking your insides. Which is why you need to have a little bit of a laugh with it some times. Hence the name dildo cam.

Oh and did I mention that your first encounter with this instrument will probably be on Day 3 of your cycle. Yup. It's squicky. This is to establish your baseline though, so definitely necessary because they want to check that your womb lining will be suitable for bedding down an embryo at the tail end of treatment.

To be slightly less crude, it’s used to get a good look at your insides. It’s not only used during IVF. Women may become acquainted with them during early pregnancy or when there are issues in that region of the body. It can give a good look at the uterus and ovaries, hence its usefulness in tracking progress during fertility treatment.

It is pretty cool to get a look at the growth of follicles over the course of treatment. It kind of helps to take your mind off the person prodding your insides with the dildo cam. A good nurse will talk you through what you’re seeing on the screen and if you’re into that kind of thing, it can be really interesting.

I find calling it a dildo cam helps to keep things a little bit more light-hearted as well. Assisted conception is heavy going stuff and sometimes you need to be able to laugh about it, especially when you’re kind of being violated by one of many pieces of medical equipment.

So if you’ve got a friend or family member going through the process, remember that many, if not most, of the procedures they are going through will be uncomfortable or unpleasant, but that person is staying focused on the anticipated end result and that helps to make it worth it. It's easy to say 'I could never do that' but the woman going through it probably felt like that in the beginning as well. It's amazing what you can find yourself doing when you want something so much.