#AtoZChallenge: S is for So Hard (Dixie Chicks)

This is the nineteenth of a series of posts that I’m posting during the A to Z Challenge; that’s a blogging challenge where you aim to post a blog post for each letter of the alphabet throughout the month of April (with Sundays off for good behaviour). During my first A to Z Challenge I wrote about infertility, which I’m sort of revisiting during A to Z Challenge 2015.

My theme this year is IVF/ICSI, a process we’re starting at the moment and today it’s S for So Hard (Dixie Chicks).

We’re halfway through the challenge now so I thought I would share a few songs to make a slight change from the posts I’ve done so far during the month.

I’ve always enjoyed listening to music and I sometimes just plug into my mp3 player and see what crops up. I call it ‘mp3 divining’ because quite often I can make some emotional connection to whatever it plays and it often fits my mood. Sometimes, if I’m in a bad mood it’ll calm me down, or it’ll give me lots of songs full of energy to justify my feelings at that moment. Obviously I can make any song fit, if I want it to.

But then there are some that fit certain situations a lot more than others.

So Hard by the Dixie Chicks is one of those. I have a clear memory of way back when we were naively having our first round of investigative tests (all those years ago back in 2011), driving home with a Dixie Chicks CD in the car. And it suddenly hit me; this is a song about infertility.

Here we are all those years later and it’s still one of those songs that hits me in the chest every time I hear it. Sometimes it makes me tear up a little, depending on the kind of day I’m having (and how many Facebook pregnancy announcements I’ve seen that day). I get conflicting emotions from this song, depending on the day.

But it also has the effect of making me feel less alone as well.

Other people go through this as well, and they can be famous people (two of the members of the Dixie Chicks had to have fertility treatment to have their families) as well. It’s something that hits people from all walks of life.

If you're going through treatment, you'll find little things that help you cope with the day to day aspects of the process. Music might be one of them. You might find that your other hobbies help you get through it as well. I read a lot during our treatment, though for that reason Watership Down will always be the book I was reading when our cycle was cancelled.

When you're with a friend or family member who is having treatment, don't be alarmed if there are certain songs that seem to get to them. It might be a song they hear on the radio that has a deeper meaning to them, a part of a film that they find inexplicably upsetting, a place they no longer wish to visit. They'll be a reason for that somewhere and trust that if and when they're ready, they'll share it with you.